Professional Projectionists 101

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Hi friends,

I recently came across a TikTok video in which a man says that a woman being well-traveled is a red flag because…get this…it means she sleeps around.

The leaps and bounds people go through to project their perspective onto others make my head spin! I don’t know where the connection is, but perhaps this man travels only to sleep around and assumes others do the same. Who knows.

But if you’re trying to avoid people who lack self-awareness and will blame that on you, heed the warnings below.

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Red Flags for Avoiding Projectors

1. They say things like, “I’d rather be in a miserable relationship than be single.” This person will project their insecurities onto you and trust me, it will exhaust you trying to fill their emotional voids.

2. When you try to end things, they say "enjoy your cats" (as if they're threatening you with a bad time). If they think this is an insult, they can’t be saved.

3. They push their insecurities onto everything. Now women can’t travel, read too much, make too much money, rest, work too hard, not want kids, want kids, not want marriage, want marriage. Their lack of introspection will be YOUR problem soon enough. Save yourself!

4. They judge people in the abuse cycle. If they lack empathy for people who struggle with abuse, they will project justifications for their own abusive actions onto you. “It’s your fault I’m doing this!” “Anyone who gets abused probably did something wrong.” If you hear any of these, find the door immediately.

5. They try to get you to focus on how much they like you so that you don't notice how little you like them. If they’re constantly reminding you how good of a person they are (I’m looking at you “nice guys”), they’re projecting insecurities around being seen for who they really are. If someone is a self-proclaimed nice guy, get outta there!

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