Why You Are Responsible For Your Situationship

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What is a situationship?

As I understand it, a situationship arises when person A wants a relationship, while person B sends mixed messages about what they want - their words may contradict their actions, they may do everything one might expect in a romantic relationship but refuse to commit long-term, and so on. Person B won't leave, because they're the one benefiting the most from the dynamic. And Person A won't leave, because they'd rather take what they can get and be miserable, than get nothing at all.

People who are in Person A's position constantly blame Person B for the situation they are in, but fail to recognise that they themselves are perpetuating the dynamic by staying in it and positioning themselves as the victim. I'm all for loving hard, but I also believe it's important to find the right people to love hard on.

If someone isn’t giving you what you need, it’s on you to enforce your boundaries by communicating or ending things. Yes, people should treat others with respect, but if you are dating someone who doesn’t respect you, it’s on you to respect yourself. Stop victimising/martyring yourself by clinging on and take responsibility for your own actions!

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